LORD, can you be a bit louder; I cannot hear you!! ..

It all starts when the reptile finds you alone, you are introspecting, when u look back to the things that have happened to you...the fangs of time open wide, you try to escape but not for long.. the reptile is ferocious and swift, it does what it does best.. takes what it wants and you are left with no time to think... The onslaught is excruciating... soul screams cause the compassion is lost.. the venom spreads fast, brain feels self-energised... and blood is no longer thicker than water! Demons command the soul...
Welcome to HELL!!! ... Is this what demons have inside..VENOM!!..and nothing more than venom...

All that paraphrase could articulate was ANGER is indeed a rattle snake, hisses when u start feeling the uneasiness. This is my time to run, run and head for cover, retreat, no use fighting the demons of the mind.. if i lay back they are going to overcome me..and once the venom spreads it blocks what the mind can see ... for the moment I truly have the demon's mind.
We repent what we do as actions with this demon's mind cause by the time the disruption is over the Gods are called upon and again things are back to sunny side, Question lingers why does this sunny side come in late?.. cant it stop me from doing what i Do wrong ?.. why does it slumber all the while i play havoc...?

Some questions HE up there could hesistate to answer i guess, but considering the fact that I come under his Supereme Jurisdiction why does he let me be the Demon and then again GOD?..

Let me be explicit with a instance what one feels when is angry....

Say .. when you sit alone, believe me, each one of us likes to take time off. Sit alone and ponder over what has happened, perhaps think about "What would it be if it was like that?".. we have expectations from situations and more certainly people, situations never so but people often fall short of expectations.. demolished expectations give agony ... some souls meekly accept what has happened never do they have qualms.. but souls like me battle the negativity.. this is when i say the rattle snake hisses!!!

Pause!!!!
before i move i ahead in story, just pause, stop the adrenaline rush..STOP IT!!
all that invigorating talk was fast enough but we missed out that all this while you were feeling the apprehension that I could turn into a demon, GOD was whispering and persuade me back to what I was!!!
Expectations?... look at the expectations ... was it always that things fell short.. Cant I think of once instance where I was delighted to have all my expectations met... Yes Yes ... there have been many...
So why do i fear the serpant?.. let it hiss..let it attack.. why does the venom change me?...why does it thwart my emotions and compel me to play havoc?

Answer is im just another human being.. not the LORD!..
LORD.. I wish you could be a bit louder.. I could not hear your whisper !!!

Unpause!!
Getting back from that mind pitstop i took after the Pause, i guess the serpant then bites me and the hell breaks loose!... i feel like giving back to the world what it gave me.. the demons justify it and so do I ..
What have a done wrong so that I desreve this?.. Let people not have command over what I do.. let them suffer why do I play the saviour? World and people are where they deserve to be; sorrow or happiness.. that is what is fate .. why should I make things better ?
Venom rush ..feeling it? ..
the mind is crumpled into a low thinking menial machine that has no emotions!... Where is the soul?...

LORD .. did you say something?.. I need to listen to you.. can you be a bit louder?


Pause!!!
If i was to be the demon indeed, why all that hesitation?..Why am I NOT still thinking like Demon..why am I asking questions that are obviously implicating that Im doing wrong...
World is not what it seems (atleast when Im infected with the venom).. i can still play the saviour.. I can still help people who need me.. My help though does not change the fate of those few surely can bring the smile back!!.. I have chance to play GOD!!.. why am I playing the demon?

See again the LORD whispered!...unless I pause I simply cannot hear him...
Oh Mighty LORD .. can you be a bit louder I cannot hear you... I sincerly want to hear you


Unpause!!
So I move on to inflict pain on people, People who dont desreve to be hurt, Why do I care?.. I gave what I got, my dues are nIL.. Yes thats all what matters..only the dues..and nothing else


Once this diruption is over the serpant vanishes.. simply vanishes!.. I repent for what I have done, Poison fades away...

I request the LORD
LORD, forgive me for what i have done, I was blind with venom!
the LORD remains mute.. atleast I cannot hear him ..where is HE?..
I feel heavy with dues!.. i feel uneasy with the things I have shown no mercy for...
Question is --Why did i repent? ...

LORD, can you be a bit louder>?...did you say something?
LORD, I beg--can you be a bit louder? .. I could not hear you!!!